What is this?

My life is oatmeal.

Here's me currently, in a nutshell. I just turned 30 a week ago. I am single, live with my parents, and am having some mild successes with a photography business I started almost a year ago. I am also working on a YA series with an editor for Scholastic... but it's been SEVEN years.

My life looks great on paper. I used to be a bird trainer, moving from my native Pittsburgh to Salt Lake City, and then having the birds take me to South Africa, where I lived and worked for two years. I am interested in a lot of things and generally pretty decent at what I decide to do.

But recently, I feel like I have been stuck in a terrible rut. I love to travel, and I'm starting to wonder if this is really an avoidance tactic, to help me ignore real life.

But that's what got me thinking. I have been following the Law of Attraction for a few years now. I read and watched The Secret, and it really rejuvinated my spirit. And I can definitely see examples of synchronicity in my life. I'm sure to some, I've had an amazing life, and I really have, in many ways. However, something's missing. I feel like I am always just below the surface of my true potential. That I am somehow sub-consciously sabotaging myself, keeping me in this life that is always yearning for more. I can see the things I want, and I am working towards those goals. But I know I'm not applying the Law of Attraction to pretty much anything. So I have decided to change that.

I am giving myself a year to see just how far I can take this. There are a lot of these types of books out right now: a year like Oprah, a year traveling to find yourself, documented experiments of generosity. And I want to slide this blog comfortably into that little self-improvement vein.

I am going to take a few days and read through my Law of Attraction books. I'll re-watch the Secret. I have books that I own and from the library that I need to re-acquaint myself with. But I want to try this. I want to see my goals, written down, and see myself following the rules of this law to help me reach those goals. I feel like oftentimes my head is in a fog. I hope the intimacy with this blog will help bring about clarity. This isn't for anyone to see, it isn't about gaining recognition. It is about documenting my life and seeing where it takes me. Because I have been in this same place for way too long now.